


You Are Enough [Sandor Clegane]

by Bookgeek362



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Death, F/M, Swearing, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-15 15:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12323793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookgeek362/pseuds/Bookgeek362
Summary: "You are enoughThese little words,Somehow they're changing us"-REGULAR UPDATES/WORK IN PROGRESS





	1. I

During the reign of the Targaryen's, my father and his ancestors were left alone to rule solely over the realm of Hothal as kings and queens. When the mad king was removed from the infamous Iron Throne, Robert Baratheon was against the idea of any of the allies that the Targaryen had to be rulers. Unfortunately for him, due to the war Robert's armies couldn't withstand another war so after only one year my father, Georgey Bentham, won the war keeping his title as King. This caused for both kings to come together and create a peace treaty: stating that both Kingdoms will remain neutral towards one another. 

It was almost laughable with how the day they all arrived was the first day rain fell from the sky after months of warmth and sunlight. Though the rain fitted the royal family perfectly. Hushed whispers of gossip that spoke of the man who called himself King of the seven kingdoms, his beautiful ageless wife who had an equally beautiful twin brother, the short man who was told to be a disgrace, and the three blonde hair children who boar no resemblance to their father. What the people did not expect was the Stark family to be following right behind the Baratheon king, only it wasn't the whole family. Just Eddard Stark, warden of the north, and his two daughters: Sansa and Arya Stark. 

The disapproving look on the queens face was almost enjoyable to watch, until the cruel reminder of their month long stay gloomed my mood. I was ready to turn in the other direction and become a sheep herder in some remote village so I wouldn't have to be put through this month. My father greeted the royal family with a smile and open arms due to the wanting of not starting another war between the Baratheon and Bentham families. Though when fathers hand met Roberts, the tension in the air seem to rise, its been 16 years since both kings have shared the same air.

"It is an honor to have you as a guest", my father began to speak letting go of Roberts hand, "might I introduce my daughter to you?"

Though it was posed as a question, father didn't wait for an answer as he moved his arm so it was resting on my back, urging me to come forward. 

"It is a pleasure to meet you King Baratheon."

My voice shook as my eyes traveled form the king to the guards standing along side his family and friends. I was quickly caught off guard as a rough hand was settled onto my cheek causing me to take a step back, slamming into my fathers chest. Feeling the familiarity of his hands gripping my shoulders with a light squeeze. 

"You look just like her, just like-"

"Robert, that's not her", this time Eddard Stark was the one to speak up. Coming forward to grip his friends upper arm, jerking him away from where he was in front of me.

"Of course she isnt. My Lyanna is dead," Robert took deep breath before he looked back at father and I, "I am sorry. You remind me of a girl I once knew."

After that encounter I was swiftly introduced to the rest of the Baratheon, Lannister, and Stark families, until the servants came forward to show them all to their chambers. 

The moment I entered the throne room with my father trailing right behind me I started pacing. Father spoke in a hushed voice to his hand, Matthias Sand of Dorne, of some arrangements that needed to be made with the training of new recruits. It is required that once any boy reaches the age of 15 he must serve 2 years in the royal army and can choose if they want to continue with being a soldier or guard. Many of them chooses that lifestyle, because it provides free housing for their family and a comfortable life, those who decides to leave after the two years are finish will receive a certain amount of money and be assigned a job that correlates with their skills. Criminals are force to serve in the front line, and if they come back after a fight will be granted freedom. Though there is one heartbreaking thing, in the event of a war all men must fight, regardless if they left after serving the two years. 

"Malda, my child, what do you purpose we do?"

"I am sorry father, I was not paying attention. What is it you're asking?"

A small smile reached fathers lips as Matthias outreached his hand to hand me a letter. Taking the letter, my heart nearly stopped once I saw the seal that kept the paper closed. The three headed dragon, the symbol of the house Targaryen. Quickly reopening it, my eyes scanned the inked words. It was from Viserys Targaryen saying how him and his sister Daenerys, who is the same age as me, have been staying in the Free City of Pentos and he is now ready to come reclaim the Iron Throne, which in his words is his birthright. The letter continued to say that he wanted King Bentham to swear an alliance to him just like he did for his own father the Mad King during the war. Apparently he has arrange a marriage between his sister and a Dothraki king named Khal Drogo in order to secure an army. 

Matthias broke the silence as I finally handed the parchment back to him.

"What would you do in this situation? The king who sits on the Iron Throne is staying in your home while the man declaring its his birthright for the same throne and is demanding for you to swear to follow him in taking it back. 

"I am not my father and neither is he. I am not bond to whatever alliance he has made before I was even born. For Viserys to write a letter saying that it's his birthright, so we should supply him with an army is not something I would allow. We haven't heard from a Targaryen since the death of Rhaella Targaryen. If he wants to talk about birthright, then Robert Baratheon has as much claim to the throne as Viserys, Robert's grandmother was Viserys's mother. Also he if is in Pentos he will have to travel across the water with a group of Dothraki warriors. How will he managed that if the Dothraki refuse to cross water? Numbers don't mean anything if he can't use them." 

"Matthias wait until our guest leave and we will be sure to have an answer to deliver. In the meantime we need to try and figure out how much wine we got stored. Did you see Queen Cersei? She looks like a woman who could empty any wine cellar no matter the size", father began to change the subject as he stuffed the letter into his coat. 

"That elder son of theirs is who I would watch out for. He looks like a little prat", Matthias laughed at my comment. 

"I don't know young one. Maybe he is your prince charming. Such a wonderful couple the two of you will be. Little blonde headed children with an attitude that matched shit in a brothel house."

"Mind your language Matthias. You may be a friend, but I would rather my daughter have manners when it comes to her words."

"It's not like you have a mouth of a saint father", I started making my way towards the throne doors to leave, "then again I've heard actual worse saying from the kind women in the brothel houses."

Those final words caused my father to freeze and drop his smile, words began to stumble out of his mouth in a incoherent mess while I closed the door. Laughing to myself I gathered a fistful of my dress and began to run down the corridors towards the library. Once I reached a corner I ran face first into a chest of iron. Falling on my back I was met with the sight of a man who looked to be giant, and standing next to him was the one called Joffrey, who I just a few moments ago called a prat. 

"So sorry princess Malda. My dog was stupid enough to not watch where he was going", Joffrey stretched out his hand in which I slowly took in order to get back on my feet, "apologize to the princess, dog."

The way he spoke towards his protector made my stomach turn in a bad way. How you treat those whos ' status is below you, really shows what type of person you are. My accusation of him being a prat have proven to be true so far. 

"It is not his fault. I was the one who was carelessly running like a mad man. I am truly sorry Ser for the inconvenience of running into you."

My eyes were trained at the large man, trying to avoid looking at the right side of his face. It was severely burnt, looking like an old scar from years ago. Part of his hair was missing on that side making it appear like he had random strands of hair missing. 

"Nonsense! It was his-"

"No, it was my fault, and my fault only", I quickly cut off the prince with a stern tone, "now if you can excuse me I have matters to attend to. Have a good day."

 

[UNEDITED]


	2. II

Sansa Stark, unlike her sister, was becoming a nuisance. We have yet to converse properly with one another, but watching her follow Eddard Stark begging him to get her a new dress for when they arrive at Kingsland was becoming almost too depressing to witness. The moment my eyes settled onto my lady maid, Greer, I asked her to assemble all my dresses into the parlor room for a showcase. Once I was informed that everything was laid out and ready to be seen, I made my way to try and find the young redheaded girl.

Though finding the girl was almost too easy, as she spotted in front of the courtyard, flirting aimlessly with the young Prince Joffrey. Approaching the two children, my eyes caught the sight of the knight whose job was to protect the eldest son of King Robert. He was standing off to the side with his hand gripping tightly onto the handle of his sword as he watched the two young ones talk among themselves. In a quick moment, his eyes settled themselves in my direction. Startled, I stood straighter as I curtsied towards the man and sent a smile his way. His reaction wasn't a pleasant one, his eyes narrowed as a grunt escaped his lips that were in the form of a frown.

"Lady Sansa", I called out as I walked towards the girl after looking away from the knight, "If you could come with me, I have a surprise."

Both Sansa and Joffrey jumped at the sound of my voice, without hesitation they each took a few steps back to put some distance between one another. Raising an eyebrow, I took a step towards Sansa and laced my arm with hers.

"Come I must show you before the feast," with a sharp tug I pulled the girl away from her precious prince.

"Princess Malda. If you don't mind me asking, where exactly are we going?"

A smile settled on my lips as we reached the parlor doors I let go of her arm and turned to face her, "I couldn't help but hear you telling your father you need a new dress. Which reminded me of how I have many dresses that I have no longer use for so you can have your picking of whatever or how many dresses you want."

Watching Sansa's expression the moment she entered the parlor room caused an ache in my chest. Looking at her now made the upsetting reminder of how I have always wanted a sibling. The wanting to share my life with someone I could call my brother or sister, to be able to grow along side someone else. Father has made it so I was never without anything I ever wanted, yet the only issue with that is that he couldn't give me a companion. None of the servants that I was around on a daily basis were near my age for they were far older than myself, old enough to be my mother. The girls who lived in the city that were my age were busy with their own lives and dealing with the prospect of getting married. Only a handful of times it has been that I have left the castle, I never had a need to leave unless it was to check on the food supplies for poor to make sure they were not starving to their death or to check on the orphaned children.

"I couldn't possibly take any of your gowns!", Sansa exclaimed.

"Nonsense, I insist. Some might be too short but I will have my seamstress take the sleeves off and add them to the hem of the dress since in Kingslanding the weather is much more inviting and warm."

I couldn't help but smile and enjoy my time as I watched Sansa try on multiple gowns, seeing her twirl in happiness when she took a liking to a certain one. Though this girl could be obnoxious, the growing feeling of attachment began to grow. It wasn't until she chosen ten dresses when I invited her to sit for some wine and grapes to snack on before the feast.

"Lady Sansa, enlighten me. Who exactly is that knight who is assigned to protect Prince Joffrey."

I watch her take a small sip of wine before wincing at the taste. A laugh was threatening to escape my lips as I now seemed to remember that this child was only 13 years old and the only wine she has probably ever had must have been greatly watered down.

"He is no knight, princess. He is Prince Joffrey's dog, everyone calls him the Hound," she replied picking at the grapes.

"Please just call me Malda, no need for such formal titles. Correct me if I am wrong though. I am almost certain that his birth name is neither dog or hound."

"I was told that his name is Sandor. Sandor of House Clegane."

"House of Clegane. Well, no wonder they call that poor man a dog. His house sigil is the three black dogs, aren't they Lady Sansa?"

"Sansa. If I am to call you by your birth name then I think you should be able to do the same", this caused me to smile, "He is not a poor man. I have heard terrible things about him. That he kills for joy and he has no mercy and that-"

"Unless you don't hold any evidence of such things, I see no reason for you to be listening to gossip."

Silence fell over the two of us as from the corner of my eye I watched some of the servants finish putting the dresses into boxes for their new owner. Sansa had beautiful taste, one that was befitting of a queen, no wonder she kept trying to be around Joffrey. She wants to be the queen of the seven kingdoms, the letters I've seen from Kingslanding that fathers' spies have sent didn't talk about a heaven. Kingslanding was a dangerous place, where an innocent girl like her could be ruined. Rising to my feet I felt Sansa's eyes on my back as I walked towards one of the vases that held a variety of lilacs. Gently brushing my fingers along some of the petals I pulled out a bundle of white lilacs. Walking back to the girl, I settle to standing behind her. Feeling her tense I set some of the flowers on the table next to her as I took the remaining in my hands to start weaving in it her hair. 

"The first lady maid I had was this lovely elderly woman. Who had quite an obsession with flowers, she taught me the meaning of every flower we came upon when walking through the gardens in the courtyard", I softly stated, "do you know what these flowers mean?"

"No, I'm afraid I do not."

Leaning over her right shoulder so our faces were close to each other, our cheeks almost touching, I took another flower in my hand and held it in her viewpoint.

"A white lilac means innocence. An innocence that once you arrive at Kingslanding I don't want you to lose", leaning back I began placing the rest of the flowers in her hair as I listened to her hum an unknown song to herself. After I was finished the two of us retired to our own rooms to get ready for the feast.  

 

[UNEDITED]


	3. III

It was the final week of the kings visits, over the past month I have gown quite attached to the elder Stark sister. Everyday she would grace my chambers so I could weave flowers into her hair. Telling me once that Joffrey paid her a compliment about them, saying it made her look beautiful. The poor girl was beginning to fall helpless in love with the prat. Part of me wanted to shove her in my own wardrobe so she couldn't go to Kingslanding and be forced to face reality.

"Prince Joffrey and I are having tea in one of gardens today," Sansa voiced as she handed me another flower, "perhaps you could join us."

"Not today my little flower. I have somethings that I must do, though I wont object to the two of us having our own dinner together tonight. I had my seamstress make some mock up gowns for you to look over, she has insisted to make you a dress for the day you arrive in Kingslanding."

Kinsley, the royal seamstress, has developed an infatuation with the red haired girl. Stating that the Stark girl was the only one to understand the need for so many different gowns. Sansa would shout in adoration at every newly made dress brought to her by Kinsley and had voiced just how much she admired her craftsmanship. 

"Really!? Yes, then we must! I hope she ordered that fabric that has actual gold in it! It looked so pretty! And it was the Lannister's house colors too. Do you think Joffrey will like it?"

Settling the last flower into her hair I moved around her chair to stand right beside her, taking her hand in mine I forced a smile to grace my own lips. 

"Joffrey would be a blind idiot if he didn't see just how beautiful you are."

Three time I have cut my own hands trying to gather the bundle of purple lilacs that were too high for my own reach, but they were the only purple ones in this part of the gardens. Setting down the basket that held the dozens of other lilacs, I stood on my toes and while holding the dagger in my left hand I moved forward to grip onto the stone wall. The purple lilacs grew wild, refusing to grow on actual bushes like the others, instead they took to growing alongside the walls. Before I could attempt cut the flowers off a sword swung down hard against the wall doing it for me. Jumping out of the way in surprise I watched as the flowers drop to the ground. Before trailing my eyes away from them to the man who was removing his sword from the wall. 

It was him. Sandor Clegane. 

"Thank you Ser", I quickly bent down to gather the fallen treasure. 

"I am no Ser," he grunted out before turning his back and leaving. 

"Wait Clegane! I have a favor to ask."

He paused where he stood not bothering to turn to look at me, but waiting for me to continue.

"If it isn't much trouble, could you possibly help with gathering flowers? You are much taller than me and are able to reach higher, which is something I am unable to do. I would be greatly appreciative of you." 

Hearing another grunt from him, he turned to now face me. Without hesitation he marched towards where I stood and took the dagger from my hand and moved to the side of me. 

"Well what are you waiting for? Lead the way."

Watching him wordlessly cut flowers in thick bundles and handing them off to me without a glance began to be a routine for the few hours spent baking in the sun. If I wanted him to stop cutting and switch to a different area all I would have to do was place a hand on his arm and lead him to a new bush or tree. By the time we were done making our way around the garden I had three baskets filled to the brim with a variety of flowers, cause a smile to never leave my lips throughout the time spent. 

Beads of sweat was showing across his forehead and his steps to follow me became slower due to the heavy armor he wore. Never once did he complain though, it was a comfortable silence between of us, and now watching him secure the dagger in one of the baskets I couldn't help but feel guilt. The poor man was probably beyond thirsty or at the very least starving. Taking a step towards him and settling my own hand on his back since he was kneeling away from me. 

"If you could do me another favor, I will not ask for anything else from you afterwards." I was hesitate to speak, in fear of his finding me to be stupid. 

"What is it, girl?", the moment his voice echoed through the garden I felt a shiver rush through my body. Watching him stand to his full height and look down at me was astonishing. I barely reached his mid chest area and had to tilt my head up in order to look at his eyes. 

"Join me for tea?", the words itself sounded off, " I want to thank you for your help today. I couldn't possibly have gotten even half of what you managed to retrieve by myself."

Something flickered in his eyes, hesitating to answer my proposition. Right before he could even answer the prat's voice yelled across the garden. Yelling for his 'dog'. Watching Sandor turn to face his prince without even thinking and walking towards him, leaving me behind without a second glance. Looking down I noticed a certain flower laying on top of the basket that he was just holding a moment ago. Reaching down I picked the flower up and examined it before looking back at the man walking away.

"Clegane! Wait one moment!", running towards him I reached out to grab onto his arm for the hundredth time today, "here. Since we can't have tea, then take this flower. Its a white heather. You are the protector of the prince so it would be fitting for you have the flower of protection."

Smiling I stood high on my toes to place the flower under his leather sword strap that went around his chest. Smiling at him, I curtsied before walking away. Taking a small look back I notice him gently touch the flower before turning back to the prat. Walking with a jump in my steps, I entered one of the hallways leading to the courtyard. Trying to balance all three of the baskets were proving to more difficult then I actually thought. As I entered the courtyard so I could get to my own chambers at a quicker rate, I noticed Jamie Lannister plucking a amaryllis from the ground, before he finally realized I was standing there just watching him. 

"Princess Malda", his smile was off putting, "I must say it is a pleasure to properly speak you."

"The feeling is mutual."

I don't want to be here. I do not like the Lannister's any more than I like their king. The sooner this conversation is over the quicker I will be able to leave. 

"I couldn't help but noticing you with the Hound just a few minutes ago. I know we don't know one another well enough to be giving advice, but I am compelled to warn you. I know you are a young, beautiful girl who probably isn't around another males who you aren't familiar with, but the Hound isn't someone you want to make friends with. He is not a good man, he is not a lord or anything that is suitable for someone in your position. I advice staying away from him."

Jamie Lannister, the twin brother of the Queen. I heard rumors of his beauty and wisdom. Yet in this moment neither of those could make me stop from rolling my eyes and looking away from him.

"I am more then capable of handling myself. Who I choose to spend my time with is none of your concern, now I must put these in water," I stated calmly as I gestured towards my flowers.

"Allow me to-"

'You've helped enough."

With those three words I continued to walk away from the man. That was the second time someone has warned me against Clegane. First Sansa and now Jamie. Their words only made me more curious of him. 

 

[UNEDITED]


	4. IV

"Viserys is demanding 20,000 men! Who does he think he is for us to just hand over  20,000 of our own men?" My voice echoed throughout the room and my father sat on his throne with Matthias by his side. A second letter arrived from Viserys now with even more demands.

"He thinks he's the rightful heir to the Iron Throne. That's who he thinks he is", Matthias responded smugly as he handed my father another parchment for him to sign. The three of us were in the throne room awaiting the arrival of royal family and their companions, for today was the day that they will be leaving. Part of me was grateful that they will be gone and forever forgotten, but the other part was in conflict. I didn't want Sansa or Sandor to leave, even little Arya was starting to grow on me as I would watch her practice in the courtyard with her sword: Needle.

Slowly walking up to the smaller chair that was placed next to fathers. The chair that was made for the queen. As I took a seat the doors to the room opened revealing our guests and their guards. The moment my eyes landed on Sandor's tall frame I immediately sat up straighter and rested my hands on my lap. His eyes flickered towards me and for a split second, I let a smile settle on my lips. In one graceful movement, every single one of the royals and others bowed.

"Thank you again Georgey for allowing us to stay here", Baratheon began to say as he took a step forward, "You are always welcomed in Kingslanding."

A silence fell over the room as my eyes began to travel towards Sansa who was trying to inch her way closer to Joffrey. Tugging at my fingers, the nagging feeling of knowing that this innocent girl was going to be wedded to that little prat. The words flew out of my mouth before I could even think of them.

"Then perhaps you could extend your offer to me, I have always wanted to visit the great Capital." The moment that sentence ended, death never seemed like a better alternative. Feeling the burning stare of both my father and Matthias, I couldn't help but want to sink into the throne I sat on. Robert Baratheon seemed to be shocked at my request and looked at both his wife and Eddard Stark for a comment. Sansa's eyes glowed with excitement as she showed a toothy grin while Sandor's expression was unreadable.

"I don't see why not darling, the young Princess will be most welcomed," Cersei smiled as she placed a hand on her husband's arm.

"If I may", Matthias took a step forward, "I don't see no problem with letting Princess Malda be able to travel a bit and if it would make you feel any better I can accompany her."

My father stood up from his throne as he reached over to take my hand in his," King Baratheon. If anything was to happen to my daughter, my only child, I will not hesitate to start a new war."

Feeling the tightening grip of my father's hand I couldn't help but turned to look at him in shock as a forced smile graced his thin lips, "I am losing both my daughter and hand, all in one single day. I must be setting a new record."

After a few hours have passed I watched as the servants began to load my own luggage into a carriage from my window. Taking a deep breath as slowly took steps away from the window, regret started to build. This was a stupid idea, a stupid, foolish idea. If I didn't see Sansa's foolish infatuation with the elder prince then I would have never spoken a word. Now I will be going to Kingslanding, the official depths of hell in all the of Seven Kingdoms and so on. Perhaps I could fake an illness, no there wasn't enough time. My thoughts were rudely interrupted by a loud banging on my door. Wiping my hands on my dress to get rid of the sweaty stress build up, I called out that they could enter. The breath in my throat suddenly escaped as I watched Sandor Clegane enter and close the door. With shaky hands, I intertwined my fingers together and took a seat on one of the couches.

"Clegane. To what do I owe the pleasure?", Sandor took a look around the room, never once did his hand released its grip from the hilt of his sword.

"Your father, the King, has requested me to escort you down to the gates."

"Did he really? I wasn't aware that my father knew that I would rather see your face than any of our elite king's guards", I couldn't help but smile as I stood up to grab a shawl. Sandor didn't bother responding as he opened the door again and waited for me to exit my own room. Silence fell over the two of us like normal as we fell into step with one another. Reminding me how just a few days again he made a harsh comment on how I was incapable of keeping up with him so he now has to walk slower. Smiling to myself as now I only hoped that he wouldn't disappear once we reached Kingslanding. Yet, he could. He could forget about me the moment we step foot through the gates. Stopping in the middle of the hall I grabbed onto his arm to make him halt.

"What is it now, butterfly", butterfly. That name didn't settle onto me until yesterday when I hit his chest for almost stepping onto one of those precious creatures. Though he started calling me it to try and tease me, for some reason it comforted me. I was being foolish again.

"Nothing. I thought I saw something. It was just my imagination."

The moment we arrived at the carriages my heart fell into my stomach. As my eyes fell on my father's tall figure I couldn't help but run into his arms and held tightly onto him. I was going to miss this, miss his warm embrace. Everything that I held dear to my heart was going to left here in this castle, in this kingdom. 

 

[UNEDITED]


	5. V

Eddard Stark was going to get himself killed. That much I figured out from my time in the capital. Watching him go about questioning others about the Kings nightly pleasures, was enough information to figure out his intent. Like Matthias and myself, Lord Stark didn't truly believe that the children Cersei birthed were biologically the King's. My suspicion was that queen was bedding her own twin brother. 

When I spoke to Matthias about it he only told me to hold my tongue, unless I wanted to lose it. He wasn't adjusting well in the capital. Matthias wasn't use to not having anything to do, he spent most of his time writing to my father about the people he was unfortunately forced to interact with or hovering over me as I took walks throughout the Red Keep, trying to suppress my boredom. I couldn't blame him though, Kingslanding wasn't exactly the safest place to reside. 

Both the King and Queen held their own personal opinions about my presence. Robert, had a tendency of ignoring me and straying far away. The few times he acknowledge me were the most awkward and uncomfortable experiences I've ever had the misfortune to deal with. He once gave me a bundle of blue roses, Sandor informed me they were called Winter Roses, when he handed them to me I noticed Lord Stark quickly ushered for someone to throw them out before they could touch water. Other times he would try to grasp my hand in his or move to be closer to me, sometimes whispering the name Lyanna. 

Cersei on the hand was the opposite. She would constantly send for my persence, requesting I join her for tea or a walk in the gardens or to get fitted for a new gown. The affection she began to spur on me was shocking, but of course it wasn't real. Once over hearing a conversation between her and Joffrey where she states how anyone who wasn't a Lannister was to be seen as an enemy. What caused to truly despise the woman was the underlying fact that she was forcing Joffrey to be kind to Sansa, having a Stark wrapped around a Lannister's finger was seen as power. Though she sent presents of dresses, jewelry, and anything else a young girl could want, I knew it was all part of her game.

Gathering a handful of one of the fine dresses Cersei Lannister had sent me, I walked the steps towards where Sansa sat waiting for the tournament to begin. Matthias denied my offer to attend for he didn't see the enjoyment in watching grown men getting thrown off horses by a large stick. Sansa quickly perked up in her seat as she saw me coming closer towards her, until my eyes met the metal plate of mans covered chest. Looking up, the man was obviously a Lannister guard as his chest piece had the carving of a lion bestrode on it. The knight informed me that the queen requested that I sit with her and her family. Requested, as if I really had a saying. Peering over to where the royal family were seated I quickly searched for the tall frame of Clegane.

"Ah, my precious little princess", Cersei cooed as I stood in front of her and King Robert who was aimlessly drinking paying no attention to what was happening, "how are you today?"

"Wonderful, thank you for allowing me to attend this festive event", a smile was shown on my face, yet all I could think was how much I wanted to return home. 

"That dress really does suit you, yellow if your color."

That was the end of the conversation as I took a seat besides Joffrey, who's eyes didn't bother to move towards me. Something I was greatly thankful for. I could feel the presence of Sandor behind me, causing my nerves to calm down as I wiped the sweat from my hands on my cloak. Since I been here, I found comfort in his company, even if just in passing there would be a moment when I felt completely safe.

Watching sir Gregor Clegane approach the king to bow, I quickly looked to Sandor. I didn't know anything about their relationship, only that they were brothers. I never bothered to ask anymore than that, didn't want to risk losing the fragile and sacred friendship that we had. Gregor was a large man, built exactly like a mountain who greatly over towered his younger brother who was larger than the average man. His face always in an unpleasant fashion that created the urge to avoid him at any cost. Though there was an incident where Sandor tightly gripped my arm and dragged me the opposite direction from his brother when we were taking a walk to fetch flowers for my room.

What I didn't expect from him was to thrust his lance into his opponents throat. A scream erupted from my throat as I watched the frail man collapse to the ground, choking on his own blood. For a second the crowd went silent at the sight. Tears almost broke free as I watched the man stop breathing. For once I wanted to be with Matthias. Gregor didn't look remorseful at what he just done, killing a man. A man that shouldn't have died. 

Though it didn't take long for the next round to begin. As a knight holding a single red rose emerge on his house, I watched as he quickly strutted up to Sansa and gave her the delicate flower. Frowning I leaned over to Joffrey. 

"Who is that man?" Joffrey scuffed as he looked at me with a smirk.

"Never heard of the Knight of the Flowers?", I shook my head as he let out a deep sigh, "He is Loras Tyrell son of Lord Mace Tyrell and the heir to Highgarden." 

Thanking the boy for informing me I quickly tried to remember who he was. Anyone brave enough to give the heir of the Iron Throne's future wife a rose, was someone to remember.

It all happened so fast. One moment Gregor Clegane fell to the ground and the next he was cutting the head off his horse and trying to attack Loras Tyrell. I pushed my body up from the chair in shock before being harshly pushed backwards as Sandor ran forward, bumping into Joffrey who stood up as well. He gripped the side of my arms until I regain balance as we both shared a look of shock. My heart almost stopping the moment Sandor knelt to the ground as King Robert ordered them to stop, Gregor's sword nearly missing Sandor's throat by an inch.

"I owe you my life Sir", Loras Tyrell stated as he approached Sandor. Clegane responded back, but not loud enough for me to hear before the Tyrell boy took his arm and held it in the air. The crowd erupted, cheering both men. The only thought was how the fear of losing Sandor nearly tore my heart in the spam of a second. 

It wasn't till hours later when I found myself standing in front of the door of Sandor Clegane's chambers. Some part of me knew I didn't belong here, but I needed to see him, to hear his voice to know he was okay. Sharply beating on the door, he quickly threw it open causing me to take a step back at the motion. 

"What are you doing here, butterfly?", he was no longer wearing his armor. Instead he wore a simple crème colored tunic and trousers, his feet were bare. I didn't bother responding as I ducked under his arm in order to enter the room. It was simple. Only a bed, table, and a small chair. There were only three candles lighting the small room. Hearing the door close I turned back around to face him. Looking at him, I felt a rush of emotion. Tears began to well up in my eyes and my chest began to hurt. Taking a few steps towards him, I aimed a punch towards his chest.

"You idiot! You could've died! He could've of killed you, we both know that! And you still-" his hand covered my mouth stopping me from continuing my rant.

"Shut it girl", he harshly whispered, "do you want the whole city to know you're here? And stop your crying."

He removed his hand and wiped it on his tunic, tears flowed freely as I stared down towards the ground. 

"I can't have you die on me Sandor Clegane. You don't understand how it felt watching you fight your brother. I don't want to lose you. You're my friend, one of the very few people I trust. You need to promise me you won't ever do what you did today ever again. You can't risk your life like that again." I looked back up to him, he was simply staring down at me. 

"I am the guard dog of the prince. I have to risk my life for him, and when that fucker becomes the king there will be a time when I have-"

"Then fuck the king. Fuck Joffrey. He doesn't deserve throne", Sandor grunted at my response.

For a single moment everything felt okay. 

A/N: what do you guys think go Sandor & Malda's relationship so far? Is it to fast or to slow? Anything you guys want to see happen with them? Alway open to suggestions!!! 

[UNEDITED]


	6. VI

"Why would you do this? If the Lannister's has found this instead of me, who knew what they would do!" I watched Matthias rub his face repeatedly as I threw the papers that belonged to Lord Stark on his desk. I was trying to find some parchment to write to father when I discovered the hidden scrolls detailing the investigation of finding King Robert's bastard children in order to throw the Lannister's off the Iron Throne, at the end of each scroll was the Stark seal.

"Malda, this is none of your concern", Matthias stated as he now began to rest his elbows on the table. His tired face was rid of any youth, making it seemed like he has aged a century since stepping foot in the great capital.

"None of my concern? I think my fathers hand's, who is to also be my hand when I take the crown, life is very much my concern. I want you living, not six feet below the ground."

"If you must know, Lord Stark is merely having me hold a few letters for him, until he can gather enough evidence."

"Evidence for what? Getting his head removed from his neck?"

Silence merged into the room as I tightly held the crumpled up scrolls. I wanted to throw them in the fire, get rid of any trace that Matthias was corresponding with a man who was turning into an enemy of Westeros. Slowly he stood up from his chair and walked around the desk till he stood in front of it, leaning his back against the edge, staring at back at me.

"Enlighten me, Malda. What are you going to do about the on coming threats to your crown?" I gave him a frown trying to figure out what he was trying to say.

Letting a sheepish smile settle on his lips he started to speak again, "You have the Targaryen crude trying to take away your army. The Lannister's are bent on making an alliance with you, and most importantly you have yet to be wed or at least courted. Don't give me that look, you are eighteen and haven't accepted any of the courtships that have been offered to you. I know you've been receiving them, because everyday I keep finding more and more letters ripped into pieces. I was informed that the Tyrells have been trying to have you come to their court in order to introduce you to Loras Tyrel."

I couldn't find my words. I knew he would find out sooner or later about the torn letters I tried throwing out, in hopes that I wouldn't have to face the impending reality of being married to some highborn lord. Twisting my fingers around, I looked away from his clever eyes. It was expected of me to marry before I took my fathers throne, but I never thought the time would come so fast. 

"Or perhaps none of the letters have caught your eye, because you've been so distracted by that Stark girl and the prince's guard dog. You have duties as the future ruler of your kingdom, you-"

"Sandor Clegane and Sansa Stark. If you are you refer to them, please do it correctly. I am not distracted I am enjoying their company. My father is neither ill nor old, so I don't need to be in such a rush to find a suitable husband."

"Well you've been spending an awful lot of time with Sandor Clegane", Matthias took a few steps forward until he stood directly in front of me. Gently placing his hands on my shoulders he shook them softly, "Clegane is a knight. Knights don't marry pretty princesses who are inheriting a throne. I know you have a soft heart for those who have been kicked around, but you need to remember that there are social statues, you are of a higher status than a knight."

\- 

Life in Kingslanding continued, though I could feel the tension rising. Cersei Lannister still requested our daily tea time. Sansa Stark would enter my room everyday in the morning in order for me to do her hair and visit again after supper to tell me in full detail her day as she tightly held my hands in hers. Sandor Clegane would meet me outside my chamber every other day at noon so we could go pick flowers, I finally managed to convince him to let me decorate a vase so he could have a little life in his own chambers. Matthias Sand would sit across from me as we both look over scrolls regarding my future kingdom, discussing politics as we share a cup of wine and what was going to happen now that Viserys Targaryen was finally dead. It was a routine. Once in a while Arya would join with Sansa in the morning and just slump on the bed groaning how she should be asleep until she actually fell asleep. 

The only difference was this time after supper Sansa ran into my chambers almost falling on her face as she entered. Taking my hands into hers, forcing me to stand up, causing me to drop my brush on the marble floor. She started happily chirping about how Joffrey has given her a necklace and kissed her. Though the only thing that I understood after that was that I was going to castrate that little prat. My eyes settled on the silver pendent that held the Lannister sigil. 

A knock interrupted her loving speech about her one true love, a man whom I've seen besides Lord Stark entered his eyes taking in the sight of an excited Stark and a frowning Bentham. He announced that her father wanted to see her at once, in which the redhead insisted I joined. The man didn't say anything to protest her request. 

I hated walking through the Red Keep at night, regardless if I was accompanied by others, the only time I felt remotely settled was those times Sandor would walk me back to my chambers. Even when I would visit him at night to take a walk when I couldn't sleep, I would run towards where he slept until I was I safely in his chambers. 

Lord Stark didn't show any surprise emotion when I entered his own living quarters. Arya who was sitting on the foot of his bed quickly stood up and embraced me. Smiling I held her back tightly as I settled a kiss on the top of her head, the young Stark began to tell me how well her training is going and that I must go watch her tomorrow. Lord Stark quickly ushered us to take a seat and offered me a cup of wine as his guard left. I sat in the middle of the girls. One hand holding Sansa's and the other tightly gripping the goblet as I felt Arya lace her arm around my forearm to hold onto me. He talked about them leaving the capital in which both girls separately started protesting, until Sansa made a statement about how her children will have the Lannister signature blonde hair. I saw the look of realization in Lord Stark's eyes, he sent his children off to pack. Arya tried to pull me with them, but I quietly told her that I need to speak with her father. Giving both girls a kiss on the cheek, I watched them leave until the door shut behind them.

"You are welcomed to join them. I know how much both my girls care for you, and I don't feel comfortable leaving you alone here." Eddard spoke as he began to approach his desk. I turned around to face him. 

"I know what you're doing and it's going to get you killed. I know what it's like to only have one parent, don't make your children grow up without you."

"You don't understand this-"

"No!" I took a threatening step towards the man, "You don't understand! You really think Cersei will let them leave the city? She will find out about all of this and hold them captive and force them to watch their father being thrown into a cell!" 

I didn't bother waiting for his response as I quickly walked out. 

-

The day Robert Baratheon died, was the day we were all royally fucked. Matthias began to throw any piece of clothing of mine he could find into a chest as he explained that we need to make haste before the now King Joffrey tries to keep the two of us hostage. My only concern were the Stark sister's as I knew that Cersei now had the knowledge of what he knew. That was until there a knight entered stating that the new king wanted Matthias in the Throne Room. 

"I love you Malda", Matthias sharply stated as he took my face in his hands, "You are like a dearest sister to me, I would do anything to protect you from harm, but I'm afraid I cannot protect you from these people. You need to leave, go back home. You are a princess, the princes, you have more power in one finger than anyone else in this forsaken kingdom. Find the Stark girls and leave."

"No please, let me go with you", I begged as I gripped onto the collar of his shirt.

"They can't hurt you, if you are with me they will believe that you are a traitor too."

The guard must have been annoyed with the time it was taking for Matthias to leave, for he surged forward and took hold of his shoulder yanking him back towards the door. A part of me knew that this could be the last time I saw my friend breathing. 

 

[UNEDITED]


	7. VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Currently dealing with fires near my home and been evacuated twice already. So I don't know when I will be able to update again since the fires aren't letting up. Don't forget that I am still welcome to suggestions and comments on this story.

My throat became raw as I screamed out. The moment his body fell limped to the ground was the moment a part of me died. All rationality escaped me as I broke free of the knight who took hold of me, falling to the ground as if I could somehow bring him back to me. Matthias no longer had his head, I tried reaching for it, trying to put it back in it's rightful place. Sobbing over him until I felt an arm wrap around me pulling me away. Screaming louder and kicking like a child I tried to go back to him. Tears blurred my vision as I kept begging to the gods to bring him back. The pain in my chest was so painful that it hurt to breathe. Every breath I took was the reminder that he could no longer do the same.

I was pushed down on a bed, hiccupping I took a look up to who I was with. Sandor. Another sob broke through me as I reach forward for him. I wanted to be held. I wanted him to hold me. He kneeled before me on the ground allowing me to wrap my arms around his neck, not bothering to move a muscle as he just kneeled there.

"I'm going to kill them", I tried to say but my words were broken and stuttered, "I'm going to kill every single Lannister, they all deserve to die."

Sandor didn't say anything, for once he had nothing to say towards a killing remark. Matthias was dead, never to return. Eddard Stark was dead also. My heart flooded with grief towards his two girls who had no one else here. Every fiber in my numb body wanted to leave, yet the pang of guilt I could feel emerging as I knew I would have to leave the girls behind.

"Crying isn't going to bring them back." Sandor pulled my arms away from him as he stood to his full height, "You need to get the fuck out of this shit place, before they decide to take your head too."

"I can't. I can't leave, without the Stark sisters. Sandor please you need to help me."

"Forget about them, they won't do you any good."

I leaned forward forcing his hand into mine as tears still streamed feely down my face, "then help me protect them. Please, I will never ask of anything of you ever again. If you just do me this one favor. I beg of you."

"You said that one another time, yet here I stand doing another favor", a grunt escaped him as I began to recall our first proper conversation. My heart swelled at the memory, how it felt like years ago when it was merely a few months.

Sandor walked over to where a bowl of water and towel sat on my vanity from earlier this morning. Walking back to where I stayed on the bed, he began to use the water in order to wipe the blood that stained my hands and part of my face. Looking at him now, my tears slowly stopped as I realized that I'm not alone. I had him. I had Sansa and Arya. I wouldn't dare lose any of them.

-

The days that followed were numb. Cersei no longer requested my audience, if she had I fear I would of tried to strangle her. Sansa would only appear to me after supper, the both of us just sat near one another, neither of us talking. Arya couldn't be found, I prayed for her soul to be safe. Sandor would visit twice a day, always holding a few flowers which he would set on my vanity before taking a seat at the table waiting for me to start a conversation.

Though today I had to leave the safety of my chambers, for it was the prats Name Day. The gown I wore was black that had dark crimson roses embroidered into the fabric, the same flower were weaved into my hair. In my hands I tightly held onto a small bundle of flowers. Holding my head up high as I approached where the royal family and Sansa sat under a tarp. Forcing a smile I bowed my head to the prat.

"How wonderful for you to join us! I've been wondering when you would let us see your beautiful face", Joffrey stated excitedly as he stood up from his chair. I peered over to where Sansa sat, she looked almost lifeless. Joffrey settled a kiss upon my cheek, it took everything in my from jerking away from his touch. I picked out an orange lily and held it out for the new king.

"If I may?" I asked as I gestured towards chest to place the flower on him. Joffrey beamed as he puffed out his chest for me to proceed. Smiling I slowly pinned the flower to him. After I did so, Joffrey turned to say something to Sansa as he did so I took another flower out, this time a blue hyacinth and quickly pressed it into Sandor's palm. I didn't bother to try and glimpse at the man for I didn't need any attention to be drawn. Walking towards Sansa I stood in front of her as Joffrey quickly moved out of my way. Placing a daffodil behind her ear I bent down and kissed her forehead.

Joffrey began to shout for the games to begin. Watching Sandor fight left me almost breathless for every time his opponents sword swung a little to close to my liking I would hold my breath. It wasn't until his fight was over when I noticed that he had the flower I just gave him embedded into his chainmail. Standing up and looking down to where the man Sandor just threw off the building was laying I grimace. He began to be pulled away as his blood smeared the pavement. For a moment I blanked as I watched a young girl begin to clean up the blood. Made me think. Did someone clean Matthias's blood from the stones?

"I only meant, it would be bad luck to kill a man on your name day", Sansa's voice broke me from my internal thoughts as I looked behind me to where she sat next to Joffrey. Following the sound of distress my eyes landed on a small rounded man who was being forced to drink a barrel of whine.

"What kind of stupid peasant superstition" Joffrey questioned, I was almost to speak when someone else's voice entered the conversation.

"The girls right", never before had my head snapped towards another so quickly. Sandor's eyes met mine for a second before turning back to the king, "what a man sows on his name day, he reaps all year."

A smile suppressed my lips as I mouthed a thank you the man. He only nodded in return. The man who was almost drowning in wine was sent away, apparently held the title of the King's Fool thanks to Sansa. Tyrion Lannister's presence stopped me from praising the girl. The dwarf didn't waste time showing his disliking towards his king nephew and then his favoritism towards his other nephew and niece. After he spoke his peace towards Sansa about the loss of her father, his attention was quickly shifted towards me. I felt small as he surveyed me as if expecting me to break.

"I am terribly sorry for your loss. I heard many stories about your dear friend, a honorable man who manage to make his way up in life, from a poor orphan boy in Dorn to the hand of a king. We could all learn something from a man from that", Tyrion stepped forward and gently took my hand in his, "if you ever need anything, please do tell me and I'll try my best to make sure you get what you need."

His apology and request was sincere. The last flower in my hand was a white zinnia. It almost seemed fitting. Kneeling down to the stone ground I slowly tied the stem to one of this armor clasps.

"Thank you Lord Lannister." My smile like his words were sincere as I stood back up. He returned the favor and bowed before taking his leave. My eyes looked back up to Sandor who appeared to have watched the whole event.


	8. VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N I feel bad not updating because this story is my child. So I made a really short filler chapter, it's written on my phone so sorry if it's weird and fast paced.

"My letters are being breached!" I exclaimed loudly as I barged into Sandor's private chambers as he slept. Hearing a groan emerge from his bed, I quickly shut the door and climbed onto the bed. I pressed my hands against his back trying to wake him I felt the warmth of his skin causing a blush to rise. He was shirtless. Shirtless in the bed that I was now sitting on.

"What the fuck are you talk about butterfly? I'm trying to fucking sleep!" He sat up rubbing his face as I moved around to place the thick blanket, I gave him only a week ago, over my waist due to the coldness that settled itself in the room began to bother me. I watched as he moved down and grabbed his tunic before putting it on.

"I found out only a few moments ago that Cersei is having all my letters opened and edited before they are sent to my father. I thought something was off when he never held a response about", I couldn't finish that sentence as the cruel memory of the limp body hitting the stones covering them in blood. The man next me moved down to lay on his bed and whispered something along the lines of me being slow.

"When my father finds out what happened. He'll start a war", I looked down at him as I tighten my hold on the blanket, "You'll be forced to fight. You could die."

"I'm not dying, now shut your mouth and either go to sleep or walk back to your chambers." He turned again so his back was facing me. A smile found its way to my lips as I laid my body down facing him. There was a temptation to reach out and touch him, I knew that just sharing a bed was enough to ruin my reputation if someone found us. Though no one would dare to bother the terrifying hound while he slept. Inching forward I rested my head against his clothed back and wrapped an arm over his body. Though due to his large size my arm only barely reached over him, feeling him tense I tightened my grip. Neither of us said anything as we welcomed the silence. Closing my eyes I thought of the time before Kingslanding, when I believed the only bad thing that could ever happen to me was missing a meal.

-

"Ah princess Malda, I was wondering when I was able to see you again." Tyrion Lannister stated smiling as he discovered me as I walked out of my chambers to go find Sansa. The king requested an audience and I was hoping to convince her not to go. I looked from the small man to the other who was standing right behind him almost casually.

"Don't mind him, that's Bronn. He makes sure no one kills me", he tried to joke, "I was actually hoping to talk to you about your father. He sent a few letters before your arrival here in the capital. They all detailed how he hopes for you to find a suitable husband while you're here. I know under different circumstances we would be holding a banquet for you. Though I would advise to put a hold on such a ceremony for I fear once my cunning sister found out just how available you are, she will try and set you to be with my king nephew. Combining two powerful kingdoms would be beneficial for her. "

We began to walk towards the throne room as he began to tell me how he stood on top of the Night Watch's wall and realized just how small he really was. It was a truly nice story, until I heard a scream. My stomach dropped as I recognized who it came from, Tyrion and I shared a look of concern and panic. Gathering up my dress I began to quickly run towards the throne room, the sight of a barely clothed Sansa Stark caused me to freeze in my place.

Tyrion's voice booming through the room is what brought me back to my senses as I ran down the steps to the girl. Falling to my knees beside her I brought her into my arms as she cried, tears staining the sleeve of my dress.

"It's okay now my little flower. I got you, your okay", I whispered as I placed kisses upon her hair, not daring to let go of her. Hearing footsteps come close to us, I held her tighter until a shadow covered me. Looking up I saw Sandor standing with his hand reaching out holding his cloak. Taking it from his grip, I hastily wrapped the heavy material around Sansa. Words were spoken between Tyrion and his nephew, but I couldn't bother to listen as I tried to comfort the distraught girl in my arms. Trying to consult her with kind words. Tyrion walked back to Sansa and held out his hand for her to take.

"I'll be with you soon, my little flower", I kissed her forehead again before she took the dwarfs hand. Watching her walk out of the throne room, my heart ached for her. She was too innocent for this.

Standing back up, I wiped the front of my dress of any imaginative dirt. Taking a look at Sandor who quickly looked away. Turning my attention to the king, I slowly took the few steps towards the boy until I was standing in front of him. He looked confused. Almost like a child who didn't know what to do without their mother.

"If you dare treat Lady Stark in anyway I deem unfit, I will personally see to it that you will no longer have a throne to sit on." I wanted to hurt him. Make him feel everything I've felt since he took the crown. The need to have him beg for his own life was starting to become a familiar feeling. The guards near us, excluding Sandor, all placed their hand on their swords.

"Who do you think you are to threaten-"

"I am your greatest threat", I cut the boy off as I settled a hand on his stash pulling him closer, "I advise you to think of what is to become of you once I take my fathers throne. Why do you think your pathetic father was never able to concur the Bentham Kingdom? When I am queen I will think dearly of those I consider my friends, and destroy those I consider an enemy."

Pushing him away I made my way back down the steps.

"I could have your head for threatening me! I am the king!" Stopping for a second at the doorway I turned to the childish king boy.

"You are a king, but you're not my king."


	9. IX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N this is trash. complete fucking trash. My motivation to keep writing this is leaving me.

My lady maid, Dolores, timidly stood in the center of my chambers as I threw random bits of food and rags into a bag. She tried to help, but I quickly pushed her away and told her to just move out of my way. Dolores was only 20 years of age, a mere two years older than me, she was pretty. Striking hazel hair that curled around her breasts, her hair matched her own eyes that were always casted down avoiding any eye-contact, and her sun kissed skin that seen better days was smooth to look at. The shy girl never spoke unless I asked her a direct question nor made her appearance known when she cleaned. To say she was a perfect lady maid was an understatement.

When a knock at the door sounded through the room, Dolores quickly ran over to open it. Though her reaction to the person at the door was a squeak and nearly falling over her feet as she tried to retreat to where I stood. Closing my eyes I quietly counted to ten so I wouldn't throw the basket at his large head. Breathing slowly I took a small cloth and laid it over the basket and pushed it into Dolores's arms.

"Take this to Sansa Stark's chamber. Make sure to run to the kitchen first and pick up motherwort and ginger tea and some lemon cakes. Please keep me updated on her condition", I stated firmly as I avoid Sandor's damning stare as I talked to Dolores.

"But my lady, you are indecent. You can't be left-"

"Thank you for your concern, but I can take care of myself. Now leave Dolores."

She quickly curtsied and at a fast paced exited the room. Once the door slammed shut I slowly walked over to the vanity and took hold of one of my brush. It was a pretty brush. It was silver with gold lining around the handle, with the back of the brush having sapphire gems being the décor. Without hesitation I threw the lovely brush at the man.

"You damn fucker!" I yelled before throwing another brush at Sandor.

"What is you problem?"

"My problem? You can imagine my surprise when I woke up to the news that Sansa Stark has become a woman. Though I was even more surprised when I found out that it was you who told the Queen Mother about the event. Do you understand what this means for her! She is now able to have the prats children! You ruined this poor girls life!"

Sandor didn't say a word as I yelled at him. His face was solid no emotion showing which caused my anger to grow. Marching up to him, I began to beat my fist against his chest, "say something you emotionless jerk!"

It only took one of his hands to capture both of my wrists. For a second I felt fear as tried to jerk my hands away, but couldn't.

"Don't you be talking about something you know nothing about. Sansa being able to birth little princes and princess is the only thing keeping her alive. I am doing what you asked me to do, so shut your fucking mouth and be grateful that I saved the little bird's life."

Finally letting go of my wrists I took a few steps back. He was right. I hated that he was right. The unsettling thought of Sansa's wedding day where the little prat would force himself on the poor girl. I could only imagine what things he would do to the girl in the bed, when he murdered those innocent girls that his uncle sent him. I tried to think of a happy scenario where Joffrey turns into a sweet loving boy who would treat Sansa the way she should be treated by a husband. The rational part of me knew that this would never happen.

I didn't know what to say to him. Sitting down my bed, I pressed my hands into my face. I hated being useless and having no control over anything. Sandor walked towards my vanity and took hold of my handkerchief before kneeling down in front of me.

"How many times do I need to tell you to stop your crying." He yanked my hands away from my face and began to use the handkerchief to wipe away the tears that I didn't even realize were there. Now it was my turn to take his hands. I leaned down and pressed a kissed to his hands.

"Thank you Sandor", I whispered softly as I kept ahold of his hands. He didn't say a word as I watched his hands leave mine.

"I mean it. You are one of the dearest people to me. I can never thank you enough for everything you've done for me."

Sandor reached to the side of me and pulled at one of the blankets at the foot of my bed. Wrapping it around my shoulders, I realized just how indecent I was. I was only in a petticoat and corset with my undergarments. Quickly holding the blanket close to my chest I watched Sandor stand and make his way towards the door. I called out for him, questioning where he was going.

"Get dress, butterfly. You're running low on your pretty flowers." A smile found it's way to my lips as I stood up with excitement.

"You know just the words to get a woman out of her bed", I joked lightly. If I wasn't closely watching his face, I would've missed the small turn of his lips. Someone could be falling in love with your smile, my father's words stung my heart as I stared at the man before me.

"Smile more Sandor. Who knows who will fall in love with your smile."

"Shut up and get dress before I change my fucking mind", I wanted to make a comment on how it's rude to curse in front of a lady, but instead I simply curtsied as he shut the door behind him.

-

"I don't know what I'm going to do if Daenerys asks my father or me to become allies. On one hand she is the rightful ruler to the seven, but on the other she has no idea how to actually be a queen", I spoke as I began to separate the flowers we've gathered into separate bundles. Sandor sat next to me on one of the many benches while I took my seating on the grass. He didn't bother responding, this was a common occurrence anytime I tried discussing politics.

There was something peaceful about this moment. With the sun setting above us provided a comforting blanket of warmth as the remaining sun kissed our skin. The remaining birds in the sky sang their lovely songs as a calming wind blew lightly through the air. Having Sandor just sitting beside me as I leaned my body against his leg. It felt natural.

"Can you start cutting this into pieces, so I can tie the flowers together," I handed him the ball of string I brought with me and watched as he began to slice off bits of it before handing them back to him. Silence enveloped the two of us as I began to hum a small song I learned as a child.

"If you're going to sing, then sing out loud." Sandor grunted out as he cut more of the string. Taking in a deep breath I tried to calm my nerves.

"When a knight won his spurs, in the stories of old,  
He was gentle and brave, he was gallant and bold  
With a shield on his arm and a lance in his hand,  
For God and for valour he rode through the land.  
No charger have I, and no sword by my side,  
Yet still to adventure and battle I ride,  
Though back into storyland giants have fled,  
And the knights are no more and the dragons are dead.  
Let faith be my shield and let joy be my steed  
'Gainst the dragons of anger, the ogres of greed;  
And let me set free with the sword of my youth,  
From the castle of darkness, the power of the truth."

Sandor didn't say a word when I finish. Nor did he speak throughout the time he walked me back to my chambers. That was until two other guards passed us, whispering loudly about Stannis's ships almost nearing the shores. I reached my hand out until I found Sandor's. I've been trying my hardest to ignore the impending war that was going to appear on Kingslanding in a matter of days. Tightly holding onto him hoping that I just continue to have a grip on him he wouldn't leave me. It wasn't until I was certain that no one could hear us when I cleared my throat.

"Would it be okay if I spent the night with you?" Sandor's whole body froze the moment those words left my lips. Once I finished my sentence I realized just how indecent those words were.

"I mean, I don't feel comfortable sleeping alone anymore," that didn't sound any better, "never mind. Forget I spoke."

"Rather you not wake me up in the middle of the fucking night." Those words were enough to make my cheeks hurt from smiling so much. 

Though my happiness was soon over as we reached my chamber. Sandor left me at the door informing to me go to his own chamber once I was ready to retire for the night. Once I stepped inside, a letter was placed on my table that held the Lannister sigil. The moment I opened it the thought of throwing it in the already started fire seemed to be a very tempting idea. Cersei has invited me to join her and other ladies in the Maegor's Holdfast if Stannis was to invade. An ashy taste settled in my mouth as I recalled the last time I heard of the Maegor's Holdfast. Cersei and a few of my ladies in waiting tried to show me the fortress, but I couldn't bring myself to enter. 

Elia Martell was named my godmother when I was born. It was said that she cried tears of joy when I was born for she was in my mother's birthing room and fed me from her own breasts. I was to marry her son Aegon when I came of age. The wedding ceremony would've been the biggest one that the people of Dorn and Bentham have ever seen, yet that day would never come for his mother, sister, and himself were murdered. Sandor's brother murder them. Gregor Clegane killed Elia's children before raping and slicing her in two. A memory that I've never witness but seemed so vivid when I thought of it.

How peculiar was it that I sought after the man who's brother murder a part of my family. It was almost humorous. It never occurred to me of this until those two words were written so neatly on a piece of parchment. I allowed myself to become close and dependent on a man who's blood changed my future. His own blood that he hated with all of his heart.

It was one late night when I couldn't fall asleep that I found myself poorly cleaning his helm out of pure boredom as he watched me intently. I was surprised when he started to talk, he has never been the one to try and initiate the conversation first. He told me clearly how he received the marking that scarred the side of his face down to his neck. The detailed he held of the event was enough for tears to pour from my eyes as I jumped from my seat to hold the grown man in my arms. That was the moment when I realized I would never leave him.

The cruel reminder of his last name now seemed to haunt my mind as I began to think of all those times I crossed paths with Gregor. How many times I passed by a man who had no remorse to brutally killing children and raping women for sport. Sandor was not like him, that is what I needed to remember.

Sandor Clegane is a good man.


	10. X

Stannis would keep me alive. He would need an alliance with my father if he managed to take the Iron Throne. Fear struck my heart as I realized that he needed me alive, but not Sansa or the other highborn ladies. The thought of Sansa being raped over and over again was enough for me to try and hold onto Sandor even tighter. His sleeping body was faced away with me as his back was the only thing in my view. I held tightly onto his body, wrapping an arm around his chest and a leg resting over his waist. This is how we always ended up waking up to. If Sandor minded, he never spoke of it.

When I woke up in the morn Sandor was already getting dress. Pushing my body up in a sitting position, I brought my legs up to my chest and watched his process of putting on his armor. There was something odd about this scenario. It felt comfortable. Like I could wake up and watch him get ready everyday.

"I hate that helm", I crawled over to the edge of his bed and reached over to the table to take the heavy helm in my hands. Even though it was beautifully crafted, but it was a reminder of the cruel name that was given to him.

"Doesn't matter if you don't care for it. Now give it, butterfly." Smiling now I stood up on the bed and waited for him to approach me. This has been the only time I've been able to almost look directly in his eyes without having to hurt my neck in the process. The height difference was remarkable, standing on the bed I now reached right blow his chin. I bent down and put the helm on the bed before reaching up and taking Sandor's face in my hands. I tightened my hold on him when he tried to move away. I whispered a soft no to make him stay still. Slowly I caressed his scared face; it was surprisingly soft though where the burn started it had a rough edge.

"Why didn't you become knighted? As the kings guard and one of the best fighters in all of Westeros you should've been knighted.", I stated calmly as I began to move his hair away from his face.

"My brother's a knight."

"But you're not your brother, Sandor."

Sandor's hand came up and took hold of my wrist as he looked down at me, "when your pretty little head thinks of knights what does it imagine? Pretty boy heroes who are honorable and protect little girls like you? Knights are shit, they rape and fuck anything with sweetness between their legs, kill for fun, and take whatever they fucking want."

"That's your brother. Not every single knight is bad-"

"You are living in a fantasyland, butterfly. You're going to get a rude awaken when you become a queen."

I let out a heavy sigh as I took a step back away from him, ripping my wrist away in the process. Slowly I removed myself from the bed and walked to where my dressing gown laid on top of the only chair in the room. Wrapping it around my body I made my way towards the door before stopping to look at the man once more..

"You are what I imagined when I thought of a knight. You may not be knighted and you may never think of yourself as a knight, but to me you are."

-

He began to ignore me. If I walked into the same room as him, he wouldn't look at me. Whenever I walked past him in the halls he would swiftly avoid any interaction. In the mornings when I woke, the chamber was cold and empty with the only evidence that Sandor slept beside me was the indent he left on his side of the bed. I couldn't recall as to why he started to act this way, was it because of the conversation about knighthood? I didn't realize that I missed his voice so much until I wasn't able to hear it everyday. His heavy breathing was what I now took comfort in as I still wrapped my body around his every night that I sneaked into his chambers.

"A servant told me you've been missing from your bed", Cersei's voice broke me from my thoughts as I subconsciously tugged on my fingers. My eyes quickly looked back to the queen mother.

"I like taking walks at night, they help me think." I've never been a good liar. Father use to tell me that whenever I tried to tell him that I did not steal from the kitchens. It wasn't truly a lie at all to begin with. I do take a walk at night. A walk to Sandor's chambers, and I think as to why he was continuing to ignore me.

"If you're sleeping with someone, trust me it's no use trying to pretend that you're not. I won't tell your father about your lost maidenhood and-"

"No!", almost jumping out of the chair I had to regain some form of elegance, "I'm not seeing anyone, I still very much have my purity and I've never thought of doing that."

"Why? Are you scared?"

I couldn't tell if she was mocking me or not. I shifted in the chair, tugging harder on my fingers as I avoided eye contact with her. I've heard stories of girls who lost their maidenhood to the knight who flashed a pretty smile at them. Even though I was never friends with any of them they were always more than willing to tell me about their first time. They would tell me how it hurt, like trying to fit a scroll of parchment through a keyhole and how they bleed afterwards.

"Well you have no need to my darling. There is pain at first but it goes away in due time, and you do bleed. Though no more than your last day of your monthly bleeding. I'm surprised you're mother never told you about this."

"I never met my mother, she died giving birth to me."

Cersei didn't reply as downed her wine and requested for more. It wasn't until she took a sip from her now full goblet when she began to question my childhood like a friend would do. I replied in the same fashion as her own tone, coy and gentle. Still not fully understanding as to why she has requested meeting with me in the gardens. Until I heard the heavy footsteps of a man bearing chain and metal. Though it was not the man I hoped for. Instead it was a knight I've never seen before. His face was flushed red as his whole body shook with what I guessed was fear.

"My queen. Your majesty", he bowed to both Cersei and I, "you both are needed take shelter in the Red Keep and hen transfer to Maegor's Holdfast once the bell rings."

Stannis was here. I didn't know either Sansa or Sandor were and that was enough to cause me run off without giving my grace towards the queen mother. I needed to find at least one of them. Running to Sansa chamber's first and nearly tossing my whole body against the door in order to open it I found Shae brushing Sansa's hair. Shae's hand lost grip on the brush as she placed a hand against her thigh, a knife could be seen through the thin fabric of her dress. At least I had some comfort that Sansa had other means of protection.

"Malda, what is the matter?" Sansa questioned the moment I entered. She removed herself away from her vanity before embracing me in a tight hug. The hug was the reminder that the young girl was taller than me despite the age difference. Hugging her back, I breathed in the sweet scent of lemon that seemed to be clinging onto Sansa.

"Stannis is near", Shae quickly walked passed us and closed the door shut before locking it, "You need to pack, Stannis can't get you or Shae if you're not here. We will go back to my home, and you'll be safe. I'll protect you, you won't be hurt if you're with me."

There are very few things that can surprise and hurt me at the same time in only a few words. The words that left Sansa's mouth managed to do that exact thing, as she shook her head in protest. She something along the lines of needing to stay in Kingslanding to marry her one true love King Joffrey. I started to tugged my fingers as I took a step back away from her in shock. The need to grab the young girl by her shoulders and shake her repeatedly in order for her to reach some form of rationality. Shae seemed to share the same reaction as mine for she dropped Sansa's clothing chest on the floor.

"The princess is right, you need to leave Kingslanding", Shae interjected as she walked towards Sansa and took her hands in her own.

Sansa only rejected the offer again. 

-

I couldn't go to Maegor's Holdfast. I tried, but I couldn't. The moment I the fortress came into view my blood ran cold as the images of my godmother and her children being killed with their blood smeared against the walls was too much. Sandor's chamber was the only place I felt truly safe as the war outside began. I could hear the screaming of men and the clashing of swords. My imagination painted a ugly picture of death and blood.

"When a knight won his spurs, in the stories of old. He was gentle and brave, he was gallant and bold." I tried singing to myself softly to block out the noise outside of the walls. A flash of green laminated the room from the single window in the chamber. Running towards the opening I was met with the view of green flames burning the sea. The reminder of the deep fear Sandor had of fire settled in my mind as I began to chant a prayer to the old and new gods for his safety.

What seemed liked hours passed, I repositioned myself on the bed again. This time I sat with my legs brought up to my chest, reciting prayer after prayer for the safety of Sansa and Sandor. I couldn't help the tears from falling as the horrible thoughts of the worst possible things to happen to either of them. The sudden noise of heavy footsteps entering the hallway, caused my heart to stop. Now the horrible thoughts I had were directed towards myself. Pressing myself against the wall, hoping whoever was in the hallway would walk past the chamber. My luck has ran out as the footsteps stops directly in front of the closed doors. I couldn't move, if I did the person would know I was in here. There was a second when I thought they would walk away, until the door was slammed open. A scream nearly escaped me until my eyes adjusted as to who was standing in the doorway.

"Sandor", my voice croaked as I shifted up from my sitting position to stand up. The thought he could be dead was enough for me to sob out and reach for him. Sandor moved forward towards the bed and allowed me to hold onto him. After a few seconds I pulled away to look at him. His face was covered in blood and sweat. My arms around still around his neck, as his hands finally settled on my waist. Feeling his thumbs gently move in a circular motion above my hips caused goosebumps to emerge.

For a moment I forgot about the war happening on the other side of the wall, my only thoughts were how I couldn't live without this man. My heart broke at the thought of him being dead and swelled at the fact that he was alive in my arms. There was however no thought when my body decided to act before my mind and in a split second my lips were pressed against his own. We moved clumsily against one another as I tried to press his body closer to mine, in fear that he would leave me again. 

"I'm leaving Kingslanding", Sandor whispered as he pulled away and cupped my face with his hands, "Come with me. I can take you back to your kingdom, I'll protect you. No one will dare hurt you if you're with me."

The words were similar to the ones I told Sansa. I couldn't trust my own words as I only nodded a yes before embracing him again placing my head in the crook of his neck.

"I need to go to Sansa. I need to-"

"I already did, butterfly. Our little bird wants to stay here. I knew you would never leave without asking her first."

Smiling I pulled away again and began to walk towards the door, "we better get going don't you think so?"


End file.
